Here is a great article that I read on protecting your students from internet problems.  This has been increasingly a problem that I have noticed in talking with teens.  Whether it is a high school boy that is struggling with pornography, or the junior high girl that is talking to guys in ways that she shouldn't the internet can be a scary place for parents.  I hope this helps.

Mike Brook

Five Things You Can Do Today to Internet Protect Your Kids

Author:	Jim Burns

In just a few short years, the Internet has gone from a school luxury to a social necessity for kids. There are 24 million kids, ages 12 to 17 in the U.S. and 87% of them use the Internet regularly – with 44% of them going online every day.While you don’t have to be completely computer savvy to Internet protect your kids, you should do some basic homework providing you with the tools to keep your kids from experiencing the dark side of today’s technology. To help you get started, here are five things you can do today to Internet protect your kids:

 

1. Utilize Filtering. Consider purchasing Internet filtering software, or selecting an Internet Service Provider (ISP) that offers server-based filtering. See if the web browser or computer your child uses has parental control features. If so, take the time to set them up. Most email programs have some sort of spam filtering. Be sure to use this as well. This may not prevent all spam from getting to your child’s inbox, but it will make a big difference.

 

2. Set Internet Ground Rules with Your Family. A good place to start is to require all computer use to be in a “public” area in your home. This can combat the temptation that can accompany computer use in a private area of the home, such as a bedroom. Before allowing your kids to go online, they should be given clear guidelines on what is acceptable Internet activity, i.e. what to visit, who they are allowed to contact and how long they are permitted to stay online. Parents must set and enforce the rules in order for them to be effective. The most effective way adults can shape a child’s Internet behavior is to engage them in focused, research-driven projects and supervise their projects. Whatever ground rules you decide upon, post them on or near the computer as a clear reminder.

 

3. Don’t Allow Your Child to Reveal Personal Information Online. Many websites ask for personal information that may be shared publicly without your knowledge, or can be used maliciously by sexual predators. Don’t allow your child to ever give out his or her name, address, or other personal information on the Internet.

 

4. Don't Allow Kids to Add New Contacts to “Friend” or “Buddy” Lists Without Your Permission. It’s not unlikely that over time, your children will want to add additional “friends” or “buddies” to their social networking or instant messaging lists. Also, understand that it’s likely that your children will receive requests from people they don’t know to be added to these lists. Set an expectation that no person can be added to these lists without your permission.

 

 

5. Teach Your Kids to Report Inappropriate Online Communications to You. It’s likely that sooner or later your child will receive some sort of inappropriate online communication. For example, these could take the form of a spam email that includes pornographic images, or a website blog posting where your child is the target of cyberbullying. Teach your kids to notify you right away should this happen. Report suggestive messages or pornographic email messages to your ISP. For more information on protecting your child against cyberbullying, see my tip sheet, “How to Protect Your Kids from Cyberbullies” on the HomeWord.com website.

I was at a conference and Dr. Jim Burns had a breakout lesson on the 10 traits for a healthy family and I thought I would share it as it was fantastic.  I hope that this is a blessing to you.

Dear Parents,

With the Christmas season here (can you believe that it's December 1) I thought I would pass along a resource that has been helpful for me.  The website is:

http://www.commonsensemedia.org/

I know that many of your students will be asking for video games and movies and this site does help us to make informed decisions about what they are asking for.  I would encourage you to not let this site be the deciding factor since you know your student better than a website, but my hope is that this site will help you to make an informed decision.

I also read an article on how to survive Christmas in the economy that we are in and thought that I would pass that on.

Know that as Christmas is coming I am praying for you and your families.

Mike Brook





10 Tips for Surviving Christmas Without Going Broke
Author Jim Liebelt


The consequences of the recent economic crisis have hit many families hard. Sure, there have been economic downturns before that have affected many. But, in my years as an adult, I have never seen such widespread financial impact and uncertainty.

I am reminded that in Christ, there is no reason to be afraid. As Christ-followers, we know that God is still on His throne, and we have much for which we can be thankful. As we enter in upon the Christmas season, all of the economic bad news ought not to affect our celebration that “Unto us a Child is born. Unto us a Son is given.”

But this Christmastime, perhaps more than any other in our lifetimes, we need to be wise in our approach to our Christmas celebrations and traditions, to ensure that we take economic realities into consideration and put our families in the best posture to weather the difficult financial times we might well face in 2009.

Here then, are some practical ideas for surviving the holidays without going broke.

1. Establish a Budget for Christmas Spending. Make a quick list of everyone you feel you need to “gift” this Christmas. Then, take a look at the state of your finances, and decide how much you can afford to spend on Christmas gifts. Set this amount as your limit. Write it down. Finally, take a look at your gift list again, and begin making some decisions on specific dollar amounts to allocate to each person. Remember, not every gift needs to be one that has been purchased.
 
2. Stick to Your Budget. Christmas tends to bring out the best in people in terms of feelings of generosity toward their loved-ones. But, once you’ve set your Christmas gift budget, stick to it. Don’t budge. Once you reach your budget limit, you’ll need to say, “That’s all. No more.”
 
3. Resist the Urge to Buy on Impulse. One of the biggest reasons people break their Christmas spending budgets is that there is a strong urge for us to buy on impulse. We go out looking to buy a certain gift for someone. We pick it up in the store and then as we’re headed toward the checkout stand, we see a special super duper sale on turnip twaddlers and think what a great gift it would make, as well. So, we end up buying something we wouldn’t have otherwise purchased. I don’t know how to completely avoid having an urge to buy on impulse. But, what we need to remind ourselves of is this: Whomever you purchase an item from has a vested interest in seeing that you buy more. They’ll advertise, market, and display with their goal, to create that impulse within you to buy, on sight.
 
4. Don’t Buy Yourself Anything. According to the last statistic I’ve read, the majority of people who go Christmas shopping end up buying items for themselves. Many don’t take this into account when they set up their Christmas spending budgets. So, either be smart from the start by including an amount for purchases you want to make for yourself, or, simply choose not to buy yourself anything this year.
 
5. Shop for Bargains. In a struggling economy, retailers will be discounting items (but not everything, mind you). Help stretch your dollar by being a comparison shopper. Take advantage of sales. Lots of bargains can also be found online, and keep in mind that you might actually find your best price there. But, one caveat: Often times, online retailers may give you a real bargain, but charge horrendous amounts for shipping, and in the end, you might even pay more for that item online than if you had purchased it locally. Finally, there are lots of non-name-brand items that are made with decent quality. So, even if a purchase is not as “cool” without that popular name-brand, during times of economic hardship, non-name-brand items can provide good choices for saving some money.
 
6. Pay in Cash. Give the credit cards a rest this Christmas. Pay by cash, check or debit card. Or, as a last resort, only use credit cards for items included in the Christmas spending budget, and pay off amounts charged for Christmas gifts the following month, so as not to incur any additional finance charges.
 
7. Think Creatively. When it comes to gifts for Christmas, do some creative brainstorming on what you can give that won’t cost you money, or at least minimize costs. What can you make or bake that would be meaningful? What service might you provide? One father, for example, gave a simple print out of coupons to his son for Christmas, entitling his son to forgo certain expected household chores, which Dad would do for him instead. The son could use the coupons whenever he wanted and when the coupons had been used up, the son was expected to comply with the rest of his responsibilities.
 
8. Remember, the Best Things in Life Are Not Things. This tip follows closely with the “Think Creatively” concept. Remember that more than “things,” people yearn for close relationships and the gift of your presence in their lives. So, for example, perhaps one gift to your family might be to schedule monthly family nights where everyone can hang out together and enjoy each other’s company. In this scenario, each family member can take a turn making a decision regarding what the activity for the evening will be for the current month (like a game night, watch a movie together on the television, go out for ice cream, etc.)
 
9. It’s Okay to Cut Back. If your family goes to great lengths in celebrating Christmas, it might be tough to decide to cut back this year. But, understand that the family will survive if you do. There will always be a “next” Christmas, and as financial conditions improve, you can move back into a more “regular” Christmas experience for your family. Make the most of what you are able to do this year. Strive to keep family morale high, and place the focus on “the reason for the season.”
 
10. Think Through Other Holiday Expenses. There are a lot of other little Christmas season related expenses that typically aren’t considered. So, this year, take some time to make a list of what those expenses are and how you can save by cutting back or doing things differently. For example, perhaps you’re used to making Christmas dinner for your entire extended family and over the years you’ve provided all of the food and fixings. To cut back on your expenses, have family members who will attend bring an appetizer, or provide other parts of the meal. Maybe this year, you can cut back on your outside light displays to save some money on electricity. Buy a smaller Christmas tree. You might choose to write handwritten notes instead of buying Christmas cards, or send Christmas emails instead of sending out Christmas cards. The idea is to think through your Christmas-related expenses and make cuts wherever practical.

    Over the years there is always a sense of relief for parents as their students head back to school, and that is super understandable!  Who wouldn't be excited to have the house again and not a bunch of pre-teens and teens saying "I'm bored" or "Why is there nothing to eat in the fridge" or my personal favorite is when you walk in and they are staring in the fridge and you ask "are you hungry" and they say "no."  Why look into a fridge if you aren't hungry?

    Usually after week 1 of school though parents are sick of having to get their kid up for school and out the door, and then to tryouts, and then to small group, and it's about now that you might already feel like you want to shut down the taxi service you are running (or are at least wishing that they would allow your 13 year old to drive).  I want to offer a few pieces of advice to think about right now as you are working at this routine again:

1.  This is a great time to start getting up 5 minutes early to read your Bible.  Hey if you are already trying to adjust your body to getting up early now is a great time to really adjust it to a new routine.  I will say that I notice a huge difference when I start out my day with God's Word, over days I don't. Also, students follow the example of their parents.  It is one thing if they hear from me to read their Bibles, but it works so much better when they also are seeing it as a priority that their parents have.

2.  Take time at night to ask your student what prayer requests they have, and pray with them.  If you have never done this IT WILL feel awkward the first time, and your middle schooler/high schooler will get a weird look on their face and inevitable ask "huh," but I will tell you that this is so meaningful for them.  I cannot tell you how many times I have talked to a student who speaks with great pride that their parent prays for and with them.  They will never tell it to you, but they will never forget it and it speaks volumes for your character.  

    During this readjustment time I want to encourage you that you also are being prayed for.  I know that this is a great time and a stressful time.  I know that many of you are in financial struggles and had to get back to school clothes that you couldn't afford, and are getting ready to spend money on all the extra curricular activities.  I am praying for you and want you to know that if there is anything that we can do as a ministry do not hesitate to ask.  I also encourage any of you parents that are in that situation to check out our Manna Ministry.  It is a great opportunity to get $70-$100 of food for $30. You can sign up for that at our patio.

    We love you and it is a joy to be teamed up with you in spiritually shaping your student

Mike

Welcome to the SSM San Clemente website and blog!  My name is Mike Brook and I am the Student Pastor for Saddleback Student Ministries in San Clemente.  I have been very excited for this website ever since our IT team began working on it a few months ago.   

I hope is that this blog is something useful for you as parents, and gives you a window into what we do in our ministry.

We are so excited that you are checking us out and am excited for the possibilities of posting events, fun videos, and recaps as well as great things to think about throughout the week.

Mike